Sometimes it can be easy to get swept up in the rat race, working harder, faster, longer, outperforming… but generally it is not worth sacrificing your best years or burning out.   So how do lazy coworkers survive and even thrive in a competitive environment?  Well, Young Grasshopper, compiled below are the Top 7 Tactics lazy employees use to get by while doing the absolute minimum.

1. They hire external contractors to do their work for them.  Did you hear about the guy who outsourced all his work to China for a fraction of his salary and then used his time to watch cat videos (Check it out!)?  Apparently he was revered as an excellent employee because he was pumping out quality work.  This technique can  help even an unambitious employee look stellar to management.  It can assist with making deadlines and with multitasking.

2. They don’t micromanage. They are too busy focusing on themselves (shopping, working out, talking, surfing the net) to even remember what anyone else is doing.

3. They push back on anything that’s “not their job”.  If it is not going to get them promoted, they don’t want to do it.  So what is the point of taking on a responsibility that will not further themselves?  The experience here is not seen as beneficial if it will not result in some sort of monetary or public reward.  They focus on high visibility projects that are easy, meaning other people will do the work for them and they can take the credit.

4. They figure out how to get things done as simply as possible.  As soon as a task is handed to them, they ask if it even needs to be done.  What is the impact of the project?  Will anyone even notice if it does not get done?  If they will notice, what is the absolute minimum which needs to get done in order for the task to make its impact and be considered completed?

5. They are their top priority.  If they want a day off, they take a day off.  If they want to take a break, they take a break.  Sounds pretty good, actually.  True story: I worked in fast food and one day I went to grab a broom to clean the dining room, opened the closet and an employee was just standing there.. In the dark 4×4 janitor’s closet.. eating tacos.  I was like “oh hey, just need the broom”… Awkward!  Wonder what career path worked out for her… food critic?

6. They get the background before volunteering for projects.  They ask how much time may be involved, how much effort, what product is expected and then they decide.  Then they ask if anyone is interested in a developmental project!  So it looks like they are helping you get experience, but you are helping them by doing 90% of the work.  Smart, so long as they can put their name on it, too.

7. They don’t volunteer for tasks which are time intensive.  They will just say they are too busy to take it on.  They know that they do not want to work more than they absolutely have to.  Someone else will volunteer for that and if no one else does, they will call out someone else and ask why they don’t volunteer.  We are getting super psychological here 😉

8. They don’t “do” urgent.  They stay on their own timeline and push back for additional details, so that their involvement is minimal and the ball is mostly in someone else’s court.   Because face it, getting into work early and staying late are not habits they identify with.

In addition to the above, lazy coworkers take frequent breaks and always put their personal priorities first.  Whether it is for family or working out, they take time without feeling guilty.  And while this all can sound quite selfish, there are definitely lessons to be learned here by those who over-extend at work.  Remember, you are responsible for keeping yourself happy and healthy and so it is up to you to draw the line and take time for yourself when you want / need to and ensure you get to fully enjoy life.